Whatever Happened to When in Rome? …
Posted by Rick - 18/05/05 at 08:05:18 amThis morning as we were climbing the escalator at the Silver Spring Metro stop we encountered something we see a lot around these parts this time of year: tourists. And as tourists are wont to do in our fair city, they were standing on the left side of the escalator. People who know me, know I have no love for the “tourons,” but I am a reasonable person, and know that local customs are unlikely to be known outside of the area. As I passed the visitors, I said to the adult male, “It is local practice to stand to the right so that others can walk on the left.” A woman in front of me turned around and said “Yeah!” and I told her that they couldn’t know, and it’s not like there are signs.
We continued to the platform to wait for a train and a few seconds later the tourist I spoke to, and his 2 pre-teen daughters, walked near us and I smiled at them. The gentleman said “sorry, we’re not from around here.” I replied “I assumed as much, which is why I was trying to be nice and let you know before you got downtown and someone wasn’t so nice.”
What he said next stunned me.
“You weren’t nice.”
“Excuse me?” I said. “The woman in front of me may not have been nice, but I believe I was very polite,” and I repeated exactly what I said to him. He nodded, but it seemed to me that what I was saying was going in one ear and out the other.
All the while, his daughters scowled at me.
I could have easily titled this “Damned if you do, damned if you don’t,” but I am trying very hard to stay positive.
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“No good deed goes un-punished” also comes to mind. I think I’ve given up and have caught myself yelling at people more than once now. *sigh*
Comment by Yuriko — May 18, 2005 #
Well, some people don’t like to be told anything, or have anything pointed out to them. You had the right intention. Too bad he took it the wrong way.
Comment by Nancy Hart — May 19, 2005 #
When I lived in College Park I had to deal with lots of tourists staying at the local RV park. I approached one older man and his wife at the bus stop on a Sunday afternoon to let them know there were no buses on Sundays. He insisted that he had been told there were buses on Sundays at that stop. I pointed out the absence of a Sunday bus schedule and told him he needed to one stop further on the train, but he insisted a bus would be there so I left them standing there waiting for a bus that wouldn’t come for another day.
Comment by avg — May 20, 2005 #
I wouldn’t let it trouble ya. The road to hell and all that.
As I was walking back from Sith with a friend of mine who has a broken arm in a cast, two girls were talking to this guy at a very narrow part of the sidewalk (half of it’s been marked off for construction.)
So my friend accidentally tapped one of the girls’ bags with his sling while walking by and quickly said “Sorry.” She turns with a big snotty huff and says “ExCUSE you.”
That’s when I released the Kraken. “He SAID he was sorry. What do you want, a written apology? In case you didn’t notice, he has a BROKEN ARM.”
We can either do this nice, or not-so-nice, people.
Comment by Kevin — May 20, 2005 #
doesn’t everyone know that, about escalators? It’s not like this is a DC-specific thing, I’ve seen it worldwide. If the guy was rude to you, maybe he was just having an off day. I usually just stand behind and say “Um, excuse me?” until people move.
Comment by jessamyn — May 21, 2005 #
I don’t know if it’s a worldwide thing. Probably so, because it makes sense to have a “passing lane”, which is how I explain it to visiting friends and relatives. Still, I’ve had to tell every one of them (some of them urbanites) to stand to the right, and they always give me a bewildered then sheepish look, followed by frantically turning around to see if others are obeying this unspoken rule. I tell them that I don’t want them to be knocked down like bowling pins by the fast descending commuters.
I’m sure you didn’t want the tourist or his daughters to be knocked down or yelled at downtown. But ultimately he doesn’t want to be told what to do or where to stand in a public place. People are just always going to be defensive, even if you are genuinely trying to help. I can’t count the times tourists have asked me how to get to Shady Grove (my return line) and told them NOT to take the Grosvenor train because it doesn’t go to the end of the line. Then they argue with me (or nod their head) and board anyway while I stay behind waiting for the same train that we will both end up on. So dumb.
Comment by sam-the-grrrl — June 1, 2005 #
You can’t tell anybody anything anymore. Maybe it’s because of our unrelenting emphasis on self-esteem (I prefer to call it “selfish steam”). We’re all just perfect, and nobody has the right to tell us otherwise. In fact, I’ve probably insulted several dozen readers with this message. So it goes.
Comment by lifer — June 15, 2005 #
Having lived in DC for a short time (and not knowing much about the place before I moved there) there’s the chance that he figured you were what some in the Midwest consider a rude Eastcoaster. Unfortunately, I was asked about the rudeness of people out east by friends back home in Missouri — they just all assumed everyone was a jerk.
I wouldn’t let it get to you — you did the right thing, and shouldn’t let it stop you from trying to help in the future.
Oh, and great site. It’s my first visit here. I’ll make sure to book mark it (being a fellow DeadHead and all).
Comment by Mark — June 21, 2005 #
It is rude to impede other people. Walk behind time them and say “Excuse me” in a loud shrieking voice, then turn around and say, “This is a city, not a damn amusement park.” Bitches.
Comment by Anthony Williams — June 27, 2005 #
Reminder to “Mr. Williams” et alia, this site catalogs IP addresses. I now know where Mr. Williams was when “he” posted this comment. I don’t take kindly to this use of the comments.
Comment by Rick — June 27, 2005 #